BRISBANE AND SYDNEY TOUR: MATTS VERSION OF THE EVENTS
On the weekend we all went on tour to Sydney and Brisbane. I will now recount some of the highlights for me:
1. In Adelaide airport whilst trying to leave I got bomb checked and apparently had T.N.T. on me. I assume it starts sweating out of your skin when you are on tour with a rock band, but thanks to that I had to get an additional 5 bomb checks on me. Luckily I passed those. The rest of the band got through fine because they are all pretty boring people.
2. After playing an amazing set at Rics bar in Brisbane, Nic and Marcin with a nice man named Todd, decided to go to a Burlesque Bar. Im pretty sure this was mostly Nics idea as he seemed quite excited by the prospect and tried to convince me to come explaining that it was not a strip joint but a much more classy version oh a nice stage show. I declined preferring to stay and drink with my many fans. They returned about 20 minutes later declaring the Burlesque Bar to be shit. 'It cost me ten bucks and they didnt even have any fukin clowns there!!!' said Nic after a very disappointing experience.
3. Whilst smoking outside the Hopetoun hotel in Sydney I ashed my cigarette to the side of me. A few seconds later a woman was yelling at me for ashing on her baby! She was pretty pissed off. She had been walking a pram past me at the time. I apologised but looking at the pram I noticed a large black veil over the pram and no baby in site. I have a feeling it was actually full of cans. The woman looked insane anyway, probably some sort of convict.
4. Nic, Steph and I caught a cab near Railway Square in Sydney and about 10 seconds into our journey the cab driver had managed to drive the cab over a small wall. Unfortunately he got stuck half way over as 3 of the wheels were off the ground. We all had to get out and help push it off the wall. A German tourist ran to our aid and told us how to get it off the wall. I assume that cars always get stuck on walls in Germany. What with that big wall they used to have there. Anyway the taxi was a bit fucked but he still drove us back to where we were staying.
5. After doing a very intimate and breath taking version of '(Ive forgotten how) To Make You Cum', a man jumped onto the stage and told me the best way to make a girl cum was to blow on the back of their necks. He then demonstrated by doing it to me. I didnt have an orgasm but it did feel quite nice. He later stole Stephs beer from the stage. She was quite angry. Im not sure if it was because the beer was stolen or because I failed to orgasm.
6. Steve got called 'Intense' by both James and Eliza, the two people who helped mastermind our tour. This made Steve quite paranoid about being thought of as intense by people he had never met. Im not sure what he did about it but he did do a lot of shouting randomly at people. Including another German who tried to bargain with him for a CD.
7. Finally after playin in Brisbane a couple came up to me and the lady said "I wanna buy your cd cause you guys sound just like Cake!!" I was a bit suprised by the comparison but luckily her boyfriend said "they dont sound like fuking Cake, they sound like the Dead Kennedys!!!" Anyway they bought a cd and now I can put on our Bio's that we sound like a cross between Cake and The Dead Kennedys. Something Im sure a lot of bands aspire too.
Im sure more fun things happened that I cant remember. I think Steph will put up some piccys. Good times tho. Good times.
1. In Adelaide airport whilst trying to leave I got bomb checked and apparently had T.N.T. on me. I assume it starts sweating out of your skin when you are on tour with a rock band, but thanks to that I had to get an additional 5 bomb checks on me. Luckily I passed those. The rest of the band got through fine because they are all pretty boring people.
2. After playing an amazing set at Rics bar in Brisbane, Nic and Marcin with a nice man named Todd, decided to go to a Burlesque Bar. Im pretty sure this was mostly Nics idea as he seemed quite excited by the prospect and tried to convince me to come explaining that it was not a strip joint but a much more classy version oh a nice stage show. I declined preferring to stay and drink with my many fans. They returned about 20 minutes later declaring the Burlesque Bar to be shit. 'It cost me ten bucks and they didnt even have any fukin clowns there!!!' said Nic after a very disappointing experience.
3. Whilst smoking outside the Hopetoun hotel in Sydney I ashed my cigarette to the side of me. A few seconds later a woman was yelling at me for ashing on her baby! She was pretty pissed off. She had been walking a pram past me at the time. I apologised but looking at the pram I noticed a large black veil over the pram and no baby in site. I have a feeling it was actually full of cans. The woman looked insane anyway, probably some sort of convict.
4. Nic, Steph and I caught a cab near Railway Square in Sydney and about 10 seconds into our journey the cab driver had managed to drive the cab over a small wall. Unfortunately he got stuck half way over as 3 of the wheels were off the ground. We all had to get out and help push it off the wall. A German tourist ran to our aid and told us how to get it off the wall. I assume that cars always get stuck on walls in Germany. What with that big wall they used to have there. Anyway the taxi was a bit fucked but he still drove us back to where we were staying.
5. After doing a very intimate and breath taking version of '(Ive forgotten how) To Make You Cum', a man jumped onto the stage and told me the best way to make a girl cum was to blow on the back of their necks. He then demonstrated by doing it to me. I didnt have an orgasm but it did feel quite nice. He later stole Stephs beer from the stage. She was quite angry. Im not sure if it was because the beer was stolen or because I failed to orgasm.
6. Steve got called 'Intense' by both James and Eliza, the two people who helped mastermind our tour. This made Steve quite paranoid about being thought of as intense by people he had never met. Im not sure what he did about it but he did do a lot of shouting randomly at people. Including another German who tried to bargain with him for a CD.
7. Finally after playin in Brisbane a couple came up to me and the lady said "I wanna buy your cd cause you guys sound just like Cake!!" I was a bit suprised by the comparison but luckily her boyfriend said "they dont sound like fuking Cake, they sound like the Dead Kennedys!!!" Anyway they bought a cd and now I can put on our Bio's that we sound like a cross between Cake and The Dead Kennedys. Something Im sure a lot of bands aspire too.
Im sure more fun things happened that I cant remember. I think Steph will put up some piccys. Good times tho. Good times.
posted by matt at 4:03 PM
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